A Little Update

I think it is time for me to stop being lazy. I haven't updated my blog for quite some time, and if Oma were to ask this afternoon if I had stopped writing, it is certainly rather obvious that I must have been really not diligent. You see, Oma doesn't speak English, so if even she follows my blog, I think I shouldn't let her down, let alone some of you who have long been wondering why there hasn't been any more updates after the New Year Blast entry.

I felt like I had totally lost the momentum of writing. I usually write in the evenings after the children go to bed. However, in those peaceful evenings that I hadn't been hardworking, I had been either sleeping earlier, watching TV with Christophe, finishing some chores, doing nothing, attending parent-teacher meeting (only once, hehe...), hosting dinners, or being invited for dinners. And on those evenings that I go to bed early, it would be due to spending a day outdoors, going to the mountains, attending afternoon tea at the neighbour's, or having play dates for the children. These activities have kept me busy and by the end of the day, I would be too exhausted to write. YES! After living slightly over half a year here, I am beginning to feel less of a foreign object, the ripples of my river are slowly calming down. As I get to know more people - wonderful people - and being more active socially, I realise I can be happy living here too. This fact alone brings so much warmth to my heart.

My spoken German is unfortunately not progressing as much as my social development. The wonderful people that I get to know speak English (and German), so naturally I choose the easy way out. Ouch! Don't knock my head! It's not that I am doing nothing to improve it. I am watching German TV programmes, reading headlines of German newspapers, reading aloud my children's German story books to help me boost my confidence in my pronunciation and fluency. Give me time.

I have also only just accepted another fact. And it is a big one for me. The fact that doing housework is not an association of being a maid. For over a decade, housework (babysitting and even cooking) in my house is done by the maid. For a period of time, it was even maid in the plural form. It had been extremely difficult to shake off that stigma that washing the toilets, mopping the floor, for instance, would put me in that light. My family knows it best. Because I would always grunt at them, "I am not your maid!" as I put away their toys or this or that. To adopt the right mentality in this area while doing my daily chores is so critical to my being at peace with myself, that I am not a maid, doing maidly chores. But I am a stay-home-mom, doing the job of a stay-home-mom! It is a big accomplishment for me, someone who heavily relied on maids for years.

I started brisk walking and jogging too. Trust me when I say I would rather sleep in than changing into my sport attire to jog in this kind of cold weather. It takes more discipline and will to just do that. So many odds are against me. Cold, rainy, sleepy in the mornings, housework to complete, no motivation, dark mornings (it is totally bright at 8am at the moment, when it is sunny). But I willed myself to go (when not raining or snowing). My first jog was so ultra-satisfying and energy rejuvenating that the rest of the day saw me completing an amazing big list of chores which I had originally queued to be done over a span of 2 days. It is an unbelievably fantastic sensation to be able to jog so much further than in a hot, tropical, humid climate. I felt like a marathon runner, haha... but I know I didn't do that great statistically. Regardless, that felt great! Although I still do not jog regularly, I am no longer resistant to getting out for a jog anymore.

I started this post not planning to write what I just wrote. I had wanted to write about Meme's birthday dinner. But it is getting late, and I have to wake up early tomorrow. Kick me if you don't see updates from me in the next few days. Good night.