Accident Follow-Up Post

I am so drained from poor sleep, worrying, trying to recover from yesterday's trauma, running here and there.

I had to help Enzian with his jeans and putting on his socks this morning because it hurt when he had to bend.  He was so brave, he limped to school.  Don't ask why I didn't let him stay home.  He was well enough to attend school.  Besides, the school ended early at 11.20am due to screening tests for pre-school children who will be entering first grade in September.

My brain is dead.  I can't write but I am going to try.

There was a class excursion to a bookstore today,

No, it is not working.  It is dead dead.  I will try tomorrow, if I have the time and energy to do so.  In fact, I can't quite face the challenges that lie ahead of me.  Going to get some sleep, 4.5 hrs more before I have to be up again.

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There was a class excursion to a bookstore today, I had written to his class teacher to decide together if Enzian could walk the 4.8km (2 ways) to the destination and back.  Children are miraculously beings.  They forget the pain they are having when there are distractions, especially those that are favourable to them.  This was what I saw when I walked Johann to the kindergarten in the morning.  I saw Enzian's class walking by, it was the first time after the accident that I saw him smile.  He was limping, but his petite class teacher paced quickly towards me, politely informing me that he wanted to tag along with his class and she let him.

I paused and watched him.  He was happy and chit-chatting with his classmates.  I was relieved.

After dropping Johann off his kindergarten, I went to Ludwig's school to hand him his snack box, which I had forgotten to prepare for him while he was still home.  I had asked him to fetch apples from the basement so I could cut for him.  It was only after he left the house that I realised that bag of apples grinning at me in the kitchen.

I walked home like a zombie.  I did nothing much other than the laundry, I did chores that did not require brain cells as I had none then.  Friends suggested I buy homopathy medicine for fast healing of bruises and Recuse remedy drops for Enzian.  The drops has a calming effect on nerves and shock, and I thought this would be helpful for both Enzian and I.

Slightly before lunchtime, the twins were home, Ludwig earlier than Enzian as one was on his bike while the other went by foot.  I was grateful I fried a big pot of fried rice the day before, thus eliminating the need to cook lunch.

Enzian could walk without limping.  His pain had subsided.  He asked if he could play in the park with Ludwig.  He saw my hesitation, he insisted he was fine and will be very careful.  I reluctantly nodded my head.  He seemed to be recovering faster than me, the shock that is.  I let my rationale thinking take over, it was a good sign.  It was a good sign.  Inhale.  Exhale.

More things to see to in the afternoon.  Not too long after lunch, Christophe and I went to the kindergarten to fetch Johann as we had to take him to school for screening tests.  He passed the speech, colouring, cutting, number tests so he was confirmed a place.

When we got home, Enzian came to me and said he had rashes all over his legs.

Three consequent days of 4-5 hours of sleep has resulted in a stretched-thin brain.  I have to continue another day.  Chinese class (and tests) tomorrow.  When is a weekend a weekend for me?

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We weren't sure if those rashes were related to the accident.  We didn't want to take any chances, but we had a problem.  Our regular pediatrician closes on Wednesday afternoons, so Christophe quickly checked on the internet for another.  It was almost 5pm and many clinics close at 6pm, naturally we were nervous and panicky.  Enzian's whines on the itch and pain added more stress.  After a call to Tante Inge, she said there might be one that was still open, after checking their opening hours online (they open till 8pm), I rushed Enzian down to the clinic.

I announced to Christophe I was going to pack some dinner home after the doctor's visit before we left.  There was no time for dinner preparation.

Doctor's diagnosis:  Urticaria.  Or hives.  Doctor asked if he had a cold, I knew he didn't but she had to link his hives to a cause.  I was not convinced but did not speak more.  When asked what Urticaria is, the doctor explained it is the same reaction one would get if one had a brush with Poison Ivy.  On hindsight, I think he might have contacted some plants in the park that caused this reaction.

Left thigh, the rash developed over his bruise, and several more smaller patches all over his legs.  The bruise was caused by the bicycle falling on him.

Right thigh, more rashes.  See the big bruise below the top patch of rash?  That bruise was a result of the direct collision of the car into him.  The bicycle fell on him and caused a graze behind his left knee (big plaster on other leg).

A better view of his plastered graze on his left knee.  The superficial open wound that bruised and caused him to limp. 

Another bruise behind the rash, on his inner right thigh beside the knee.  Doctor said rashes appeared at the bruises due to higher concentration of blood flow to those areas.

Rashes basically covered him like an invisible stocking.  They didn't even spare his feet and soles, which swelled and hurt.

Doctor prescribed an antihistamine syrup for him to cause the itch to stop.  The side effect made him extremely drowsy.

The night was supposed to be peaceful.  Yes, it was quiet, but my mind was in a total state of chaos.  Christophe was tirelessly fighting his fire at work.  At the start of the week (before Enzian's accident), many things had gone wrong.  The severe stress at work was written all over his face.  The accident couldn't have chosen a better time to happen.  Ever since, he was battling internally if he wanted to make a report, and even hire a lawyer.  He was softened by the driver's act of responsibility, admission of her fault and leaving us her number and name voluntarily.

As for me, making a police report had not even crossed my mind, much less seeing a lawyer.  My priority was Enzian's well-being.  It was only much later (the same night of accident day), after talking to my friends, that they highlighted to me I should make a police report, and make a report now, citing reasons no one knows if something serious might develop later after the accident, even if Enzian appeared to be fine.  So a report is a very important document for any future related mishappenings.

Of course, I brought up the matter of going to the police that same night, but Christophe was adamant about it.  I knew his work was one of the biggest factors of his reluctance, seconded closely by his desire to do a good deed by not intentionally putting the driver in the hands of the police.  I was mad.  THIS IS NOT THE RIGHT TIME TO DO A GOOD DEED.  This is an accident, a child had been hurt.  YOUR child.  And you are thinking for someone else?!  WTF.  I view this as a case, I don't involve my personal emotions, especially with someone who had caused hurt to my son.  Now the womanly role in the family has switched?!

You can imagine how MAD I was.  He was buying time, I had no idea why.  He went on to send me links on traffic rules and those nonsense I am not at all interested in.  He said before, no matter what, any accident that involves a cyclist and a car, the car will ALWAYS be at fault.  And Enzian was hurt, she admitted she crashed into him, what else is there to stop us from going to the police?!

I stalled the discussion of making a police report throughout the day.  There was, in fact, no time with all the things happening.  But after sending the children to bed, I popped the question and he said he was more and more prone to going to the police.  Yes, what took him so long?  I thought.  Was it the rashes?  Was it seeing the pain his child was going through?

But there was a problem.  He was leaving the next morning for business for 2 days.  So it meant if we wanted to make a report, it would have to be me, even though the police is open 24/7.  He was still incessantly righting all the wrongs at work.

I went ahead to make my next day's plan, with or without him.  Preparing mentally where I had to go first (follow-up doctor's appointment, police, school), printing out the bus route to the police station; thinking who I could ask for help to fetch Johann from the kindergarten as I didn't know how long all these would take, making some slight changes and confirming tuition for Bart in the afternoon, thinking of a German-speaking friend to accompany me to the police, in case they don't speak English; and planning what lunch and dinner to make.

The first night, I went to bed traumatised.  The second, agony and anger.

Next morning (Thursday), Enzian came down crying.  His feet were pink and swollen, he said it hurt so much to walk.  He begged to stay at home, I didn't have the heart to force him to go to school.  I gave him the drowsy-causing antihistamine and sent him right back to bed.

One can imagine how I felt when I saw those rashes worsening.  Could this be related to the accident at all?

I made a call to the police station after I settled Enzian.  I briefly gave a description of the accident and asked what documents I had to bring along, and if I should also bring Enzian and Ludwig (the witness).  All in English.  I asked if there would be someone who could help me in English when I visit in the afternoon, he said no problem, I could come any time.  So I dropped the idea of bringing a German-speaking friend.  I will manage.

I have also settled Johann's pick-up in the afternoon.  My English neighbour was kind enough to fetch Johann, so my afternoon stress was lessened by a fair bit.

I soaked some noodles in cold water so I could cook them later for the twins for lunch.  Plain noodles, with some seasonings and spring onions.  I couldn't afford more time to make their meals.

Next, I went to school to report the accident to the principal.  Together, she helped to write the report, which I thought would come in handy when I make the police report.  I timed my visit to the school such that when I was done, it was also school dismissal for Ludwig.  Then I had to inform the principal to excuse the twins from Hausaufgabenhilfe (homework help) that afternoon.

After lunch, I took the twins to our regular pediatrician for Enzian's follow-up check.  The doctor was surprised to see so much rashes all over him.  This doctor who treated him 2 days ago, is a very young doctor.  She seek advice from, I suppose, her mentor, the seasoned doctor to look at Enzian.  At first glance, she said, "Urticaria."  But she looked at his upper body, and asked if he had taken any antibiotics.  I said he had just completed a cause of Amoxicillin for his Tonsillitis 3 days ago.  That was it, the dotty rashes on his upper body were a reaction to the antibiotics.  Two different types of rashes on his body.

He was smiling embarrassingly because I was taking a photo of him nearly naked.

Another seasoned doctor came in.  Two senior and one junior, all came to look at Enzian, all three in the same room.  It must be a rare case.  Two types of rashes, topped with accident bruises.  I felt much for Enzian... I thought I felt the sympathies by the doctors in the atmosphere.

Dotty rashes on his arms due to Amoxicillin.

On his back.

On his chest (and stomach).

On his hands (and palms).

Another anti-allergen medicine was prescribed, one that doesn't cause as much drowsiness as the first.

I requested for a copy of the accident report from the doctor, so I would have 2 supporting documents for the police.  I gave myself a mental pat on my shoulders for my organised actions, even though I wore a stone face.

Next stop, police.

But I have to stop here now and continue another time.  Tomorrow is Monday, I have to be up by 6.15am. 

We took the bus to the police station, fortunately, it was just 2 bus-stops away from the clinic.  It was also while crossing the street to the police station that I noticed Enzian getting all nervous seeing oncoming cars.  He held on tight to my arm, jumped and shrieked at any vehicles that were not even visibly getting too close to us (Ludwig and I).  He had developed some fear of cars.  I gave him comfort by not letting go of his hand as an ache ran deep into my heart.  He is a boy with a sunny personality, he will get over this fear with time.

This is the police station.  The exterior looks so different from our "kiosk" back home.

Inside the station, there were 3 uniformed staff and one in civil clothes.  I spoke to one over the counter, "I would like to make a police report" without bothering to attempt it in German since I had the assurance from their colleague in the morning that there would be someone to help me.  "Just a moment" came the reply and I waited, while the boys awed away with all the pistols they saw on those policemen.

"Ich kann uebersetzen" ("I can translate"), said Ludwig out loud to the police who told us to wait a moment.  He must have heard the police talking in a low voice to his colleague, about having to use English.  I didn't hear anything but Ludwig's answer to them was rather obvious.  In the next seconds, a tall policeman walked out from a room that is partitioned by glass.  He must be ranked higher than them.

He approached the counter where I had been standing and asked in an impersonal tone, "yes?"  I repeated myself and gave him the school accident and doctor's reports.  He looked at the accident date/time, "the accident happened 2 days ago, what do you want us to do?"  I was taken aback by his question.

"I am here to make a report.  My son was knocked down by a car on his way home from school on Tuesday.  Friends said I must make a police report, so here I am."
"But it happened 2 days ago, there is nothing we can do.  You should have called us when it happened."
"I was not present when the accident happened, the driver who knocked my son down parked her car nearby and walked my son home to us.  The important thing for us then was to make sure he was alright and a visit to the doctor was my priority."
"I understand, but there is nothing we can do now.  There is no car, the witnesses are gone, we can't do anything."
"My son (pointing to Ludwig), witnessed the entire accident."
"But we still can't investigate anything.  Is your son alright now?"
"He has several bruises but yes, he is better now, thank you.  Are you saying I don't have to make a report?"
"No, you don't have to make a report."
"It is funny that I am getting 2 completely opposite statements from the same police station." and I went on to  tell him about my phonecall this morning.
"I am sorry, my colleague made a mistake."

I left without making the report, I was pissed.  I don't think his colleague made a mistake.  I think he was shrugging off new cases.  Another report, another case to work on.  Apart from the universally agreed notion that all policemen look smart on the outside but are hollow on the inside, I didn't think it was the language that could have been the barrier.  But on second thoughts, and based on what others had concluded, it was most likely due to the language.  Looking back, other than the tall one, who acted dirt snobbish, the others did appear to have complexes... but it was all to my disadvantage.  I only had myself to blame for not fully integrating and/or could have rung my friend to help me out.

When I got home, my neighbour was already in my garden watching her 5-year-old twins and Johann play together.  She had also arranged for another neighbour to come over so we could sit down and have a glass of Prosecco.  I haven't stopped to take a break since I woke up, I needed my rest.  But I knew she meant well, she wanted to cheer me up.  I resisted drinking, they insisted.  At my second glass, things didn't look so downcasted afterall, because I saw myself loosening up and laughing along with them.  Oh boy! That was my first laugh since 2 days.

I went to bed after posting the accident happenings and asking for lawyer recommendations.  I wanted to know what my options were.

On Friday, things slowed down, but not too much.  I told Bart to take his lunch in school and gave him more money to buy lunch back from his canteen for Enzian and Ludwig.  After dropping Johann at the kindergarten, I went to school to submit the accident report that had been furnished with the driver's name and contact number.  As I was walking home, my mind was taking stock of the food I have in the fridge and freezer.  I did not have anything that I could churn out quickly for dinner.  I had one hour to do a last minute shopping before my English class with the neighbours began.

Since Christophe took the car, I had to rely on public transport.  It meant I can't buy much and I had to rush.

I was home with all I needed within my carrying capacity 30 minutes before class.  Another mental pat on my shoulder.  I had to do that.  I needed some positive vibes from somewhere.

Class ended in 2 hours.  All three older boys streamed in 20-30 minutes after I was home.  I sat down to check the forum to see if I had any replies to my lawyer question.  I was advised to inform our insurance company about the accident.  I got a lawyer recommendation.  I called the lawyer.

Lawyer advised me to wait a week, the school should be submitting my accident report to their insurance company.  She remarked it was weird that the driver did not call the police and doctor when the accident happened, a must-do procedure for all accidents.  No one knows for sure what could happen later on, victim might appear fine but some die after a few days, did I mention this before?  So that is why a police report is so critical!  Damn it!

Fast forward to today (Tuesday, one week after the accident), Christophe went to school to talk to the principal.  She said the insurance company will handle everything, we wouldn't have to do a thing from our side.  And because the insurance coverage is very comprehensive, we could still claim say, 5 years from now, if we could prove that Enzian's shaky tooth (a bad example, I know but you get the gist) is a result of that accident.

With that knowledge, I have decided not to hire a lawyer.  Besides, the fundamental thing is, Enzian is in his merry bubbly self again, back to riding his bicycle albeit with more attention paid to oncoming traffic (not a bad thing), I will save myself the time and focus on my family.  Karma will take care of things for me.

Follow-up update is hereby complete.

On a side note, it is time I pick up my German again.